What Scares Me When I Write

Being Afraid To Expose The Real Me In My Writing

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I have always been very fond of reading. Fond of diving into new, exciting knowledge. Knowledge about anything. From early age I was soaking up everything I could from everywhere.

This habit has stayed with me as a grown up. But now, for some reason, I don´t seem to be able to block of time for it.

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I have slowly let other things get into the way, not prioritizing what fuels me as a person.

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My craving for new knowledge has led me to gain knowledge about several different topics in different areas. Which in turn has led other people discovering that I can answer several of their questions, to ask for help.

Ever since I can remember I love to share what I learn in my everlasting search for knowledge and wisdom. One outlet in that respect was starting a Wordpress blog in 2020 with the intention of sharing valuable info to my readers.

The Wordpress blogging adventure quickly turned into a quagmire, not getting me anywhere else than wasting precious time.

This has in turn led me to Substack.

Why?

Because I just wanted to write without any complicated tools, strategies etc.

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Getting Afraid

But one thing quickly came up as I started to blog, and that was the fear factor. Getting afraid if writing would expose me, my vulnerable sides and who I am at the core as a person, which in turn lead to ( it still does to a certain degree) overthinking and procrastination.

Outcome, a blank page with nothing on it.

So what is the driving factors or reasons behind my «fear» of writing.

• I want things to be perfect

• I jump into the rabbit hole of research to cover all aspects of a topic

• I am afraid of looking stupid in the face of others if my writing skils is deemed poor.

• I am afraid of exposing myself, my real genuine,authentic, vulnerable me.

• What will my work colleagues or my boss say if they read my stuff online.

• I am afraid if someone might take advantage of me through what I write.

• What will my family and relatives say about what I write

• I am afraid that I won´t reach enough potential readers through my writing and where I publish my content.

The most impact of the factors listed above is the fear of exposing the vulnerable, authentic me. That holds me back, and is most certainly reflected in my writing, and my writing flow.

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Yes, I am still afraid to write, but that doesn´t stop me.

What makes you afraid when you write? Please tell me.

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